In my feelings

Ok yall im getting a little too personal for my liking but this is situation im in is ringing in my ears!! I have to get these emotions out so my mind can be clear to do what i need to do. So bear with me skip to the next blog if u feel the need to. But right now I'm going back to my beginning......poetry

What I want, I cant have.
What I need, You cant give to me.
All I want is to love and be loved.
Will you be able to give it to me?
 How do you compete with someones past?
I can never be what she was for you unless you let me.
Holding on to your past is detrimental to our future.
So where does that leave me?
Am I where I want to be?
Are you what is meant for me?
Or are we just in love with this dream?
Your eyes tell a story and I'm not sure if u are ready for the tale I see.
You want peace and happiness. Love and Stability
But you cant seem to let go.
So until you do we won't be what you want us to be.
And until you make up you mind we're only be in love with this dream.
I need to be free from...this...this hold that you have on me.
This wont get the best of me.
What I want, I cant have
And What I need, you cant give to me
I will control my destiny
On this journey to get to be where i need to be
The Question remains
Will you maintain your fears or will you join me?




Thanks for letting me vent SweetToothers!!

xoxoxox
MsSuga

Church time

So my homegirl and I were riding home and we got into this mini conversation about our church and how we feel about what it has become over the years. (Rewind: My homegirl and I grew up together in this church. We weren't that close until this past year & now we're almost inseparable. it's good to have lifelong friends that u can chill with @ the club & @ church.) She was saying that even though her heart resides at our church she doesn't fully understand the teachings our pastor does. Not to say that he isn't a good pastor because he is a Wonderful Man of God and we both love him dearly (He's like a second father to me) but his teachings and preachings aren't that interesting to our generation X mentalities.

I agree to her feelings to a certain extent, see my problem isn't really the teachings because I do feel I get something out of his word. It may not be all of what I needed but it is something. My problem is that even though there are so many hypocrites in the church that I don't feel the sincerity in their worship.  Yes I know you can't let other people stand in the way of your relationship with GOD but it's hard to see the people you look up to in the spiritual sense and respect them in church after watching them live secular lives every other day. 

All I want to know is how do young women like ourselves who desire the word and the experience receive the word from an older out dated source and still get what we want/need from it? What more is there to do & will we just have to do it ourselves?

Have you ever had someone in your life that you just wish you could take all of their pains away?? No matter how hard we try or what we do we cannot live the lives and fight the fight for others. There is someone that is really close to me and I trully do love her but she is painfully unhappy. Now me being the poster child for doing what I need to do to be happy Idk what to do for her. I encourage her, I pray for her but that is about all I can do...until she puts her own desires into actions my help can only do so much.

I will admit that there are some things in my life that I am not completely happy with but I am working to change that. I dedicate a lot of my spare time helping others, and in turn I am helping myself to be better person. "I've come to far from where I started from. No body told me that the road would be easy, but I don't believe he brought me this far to leave me." There is more work to be done for me and I know she probably has just as much potential growth as anyone else. Hopefully things will get better for her...I pray that they do...

If you all never get anything else from all my ranting and raving do know that CHANGE STARTS AND ENDS WITH YOU...



XoxoxoxO
Ms.Suga

A Man's World

Ok so everyday i have atleast one  in-depth conversation with my homegirl. It's usually via text message which as you can tell by the way i talk ends up being like 5 text pages at a time. Well on of yesterday's questions was "How old is too old for a man to still live with his mom?" Now since yesterday i've deleted my response but i wanted to share this question as well as my response.

So....let's got!!

"How old is too old for a man to still live with his mom?" To me there is no real answer for this question. I have dealt with all kinds of men from all walks of life and at some point they have given me their "story." From what i gather, on my research of men, men instinctively have the need to provide and protect. Which is why they are so territorial, jealous and sometimes pig-headed. (No fellas I am not bashing you...atleast not right this second). But it makes sense. As women we are very protective of our own which is why some mothers are so territorial, jealous and sometimes pig-headed as well. But here's the kicker...what does it take to make a man feel like a man? Besides the obvious of course.

I met a man who was 32 years old and lived with his mama. He had a fairly decent job, stayed out of trouble and was a genuinely nice guy. BUT his mama waited on him hand and foot! I had to get up out of there because he was NOT about to have me taking care of him all the damn time...So not acceptable!

Then I knew another guy age 27 who lived on the wrong side of the law but his place of residence was his moms house. He never "worked" from there but he had no other place that he called home. So does that count? Yes! he needs to have his OWN SPACE!!

It takes a man to stand his ground and hold is own. But it takes a woman to do everything else behind the scenes to give that man the mental boost he needs to continue holding is own. Think about the most powerful men  in our world, there is a woman somewhere close by to work her magic so he can show off his. From cooking, cleaning and ironing to sex, massages and a simple kiss to replace words of encouragement to remind that man that it is his world!!

So ladies lets be real...people go through hard times but a real man will make the most out of his situation and work hard to put himself in a better place. There is nothing sadder (just an expression of course there is something sadder than this) than a grown ass mama's boy who is so comfortable under mommy that he doesnt realize that taking care of me will help me take care of him in more ways then his mama is willing to acknowledge.

So kids what the lesson for today? GROW THE FUCK UP!! THEN MAYBE I CAN RESPECT YOU.

Ephipany

Ok so everytime someone has a problem they come to me. Relationships, money, life what ever their problem is they think my advice can and will help them. Granted I feel that i don't have a relationship or money, hell or a life for that matter, so why would i be one to give good advice but apparently I do because they keep coming back.

The more I think about my future and my career as a writer, especially recently, the more I think about being a columnist. Nothing major just a measly 600 words or so giving my opinion on something and everything. This way i can keep my identity as an opinionated human being and not get lost in the world of facts and lies.

So with all this being said, I am letting you all know that the Cavity Requests will be open to questions and advice. Now i will not guarantee my advice will always work in your favor but if you need it i am here to give it to you. Don't get it twisted, I will still be here to rant rave and bitch about whatever pops into my mind but I am here to help you as well.

Email any questions with as much detail as possible to MsSuga1910@gmail.com

And you will remain anonymous!!

xoxoxoxoxoxo
Ms Suga

I'm Sorry!!

Hello my sweet tooth havers!! Sorry I have been MIA for almost a month! I didn't realize it had been that long! but i'm back on point! I have a lot going on but that is no excuse! I will never leave you for so long like that ever again ok?. LoL! Dramatic huh?

Anyway! New Cavity Requests coming soon! Remember if there's anything you want me to talk about just hit me up MsSuga1910@gmail.com


xoxoxoxoxoxox
MsSuga

Really??

Ok so I know that work is scarce. and you don't have to tell me about how hard it is to find something to do for the remainder of the day. BUT having an in depth conversation about American Idol in the ladies room is not a way to pass the time! Especially in the one part of the building that echos!!

Get it in gear ladies before you screw us all over!!

xoxoxoxo
MsSuga

What the fuck is really going on?

You know what? I am sick and tired of being sick and tired! I swear to bob if one more man tells me "Your gonna make a great wife" or "You would be an awesome girlfriend" I am going to start cracking muthafucking skulls. Once again someone tells me Oh you are a wonderful beautiful, sexy woman any man would love to have u. But all they do is say it...Remember people Actions speak louder than words!! If I'm so fucking wonderful why am I still single? How is it that you can point out such a wonderful person but u don't try to claim that person for yourself. I know if I see a good person I would love to lock that in and keep them all to myself!!

Granted I am happy with myself and my life. I, like most people, do want someone to share my life with. I'm not talking about getting married right now I mean just someone to have fun with, live, learn and love with. I am however, very picky. I don't want to be in a relationship for the sake of claiming it and have my boo still off freaking every person they meet. People these days are so caught up in what others are doing they cannot seem to do what is right. Be happy with yourself not trying to get over on others.

I see how a person can be in a relationship for along period of time yet want and step to others knowing damn well they are planning on being fucked up people. I am so tired of that bullshit. I mean really?? What the fuck is really going on in your head? Why do you think that will work?!! It always turns out the same. And you wonder why no one trusts your dumb ass. Because you are a fucked up, greedy, selfish person! You really need to sit back and think about what you are doing? Think long and hard and ask yourself What the fuck is really going on?

If ya'll knew how many people have tried to be with me and get my goods like I didn't know that they were in a relationship. It's ridiculous! Go be with her why are you trying to get pussy when you wake up to, sleep next to, and get some when you want why do you need my pussy. Go the fuck away!! Honestly leave me to my destiny. Don't come fuck up my life because you aren't happy with the one you are with.

There are a lot people in this world that want the chance to get close to me. Most wont, some will but only get a half-assed friendship because I don't trust people and that one special person may slip through the cracks and we both end up fucked up people because of your selfish unhappy ass.

So I don't know what the fuck is really going on but we need to get it together!! We are on the path of destruction going no where fast! Ugh!!



xoxoxoxo
MsSuga

Life

Don't waste your time on a dead end job living paycheck to paycheck! Learn to have fun and love life. Everyday I feel like I lose part of my life sitting around here. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE working, but I am to the point where I need more. There is more to life than cubicles and calculators and not knowing what  the outside looks like on a daily basis.

I WANT TO BE FREE!! I need mind challenges and excitement, and overtime!!  Granted this is a temporary situation but everyday makes me move forward more and more to what I want to do. I refuse to be that person who lives to be 75 years old, hate my job and the end still be miserable.

So whats the point of this? Here's your dose of Suga!! Live life for you!! Be Healthy, Be Happy, Be Sane!!

Cavity Request: Be Yourself

I know, i know i haven't been around for a while but hey I had a lot going on. I apologize and i hope you all can forgive me and accept my toke of apology: another dose of Suga for your sweet tooth!

This was somewhat requested by several people. We would have a conversation that made it clear that this is what I need to speak on. So...lets do it!

I cannot stand LIARS and FAKERS! Just be yourself. You don't have to lie to get ahead with me. Just be real. I always say that I would rather you tell me the truth and break my heart then lie to me and loose me forever. Granted I understand some lies are necessary, and those are accepted by society so I try not to make a big fuss. BUT In the end the truth always sets you free. (Kind of cliche right?) Let me tell you a story...

Picture it South Florida 2008...lmbo..Just playing guys...

I met this guy whom we will call Mack. And Mack was a wonderful man. Sweet, caring, funny, loving and treated me like a Queen. He cooked for me and used to take me this place were we would sit by the water and just talk. He'd wrap his arms around me and we would laugh and think and talk about our dreams. Now see the problem with Mack was that even though he spent sooooooooooo much time with me, Mack also had a girlfriend. When we first met I knew that him and her were on the outs, so it makes sense that I just figured that they broke up. (It would be safe for you to assume that I was wrong seeing as I am writing about this situation.) Well Mack and I started getting really serious and one day with tears in his eyes he told me he loved me. Literally two weeks later I got a text message from Mack that said "Me and that bitch are done! She told me the baby aint mine"  WTF 1) what bitch are you done with? B) What baby? & 3rd) when the fuck were you gonna tell me?? Our whole relationship was a lie. After I politely told him what he can kiss, where to go, and even offered to send him there he still called me. Told me she was crazy, he wasn't happy and he wanted me but didn't want to leave his son. That part is understandable. I told him to leave me alone, and go work on that relationship that he felt the need to lie to me about. Yes my feelings were hurt. Yes I have issues trusting him or people in general. And Yes I am over him. I forgave him for what he did because I refuse to hold on to anger.

In the end he still calls me, tries to rub in how "happy" he is with her. I tell him don't try to prove it to me that's your life not mine. I am merely someone he met in passing. I do believe he loved me, but that shit is for the birds! He still lied to me! Led me to believe it was us against the world and not only was he with her but she was carrying his child! Now we can't have that friendship we had before. There will be no more in depth conversations about cartoons. Or watching this boats sail by. That is over. I just hope somewhere down the line he truly becomes happy. I feel like even though lying to me made it easier for him to handle his business, I do know that lying to yourself will ruin you forever.  You hurt others but more importantly you hurt yourself! And what do you have to show for it?

The moral of this story stop lying! Be yourself!



xoxoxoxo
MsSuga

Cavity Request: Corporal Punishment in School

So my ex bf gave me this suggestion: Is corporal punishment needed in schools today?

Ok first off let me tell you that I went to a Black-owned, Christian School from pre-k all the way to 7th grade. So of course, I got spankings in school. And of course, my mother approved them. She told every teacher, counselor on that campus that if I got out of line to "Take that shoe of yours and beat her ass!" I will admit that some of them did...hell all of them would but I wasn't that bad of a child. I respected my elders, did my lessons, didn't prevent anyone else from getting theirs and went on about my business.

I had bible class EVERY DAY and we had chapel service every Friday at the church 2 blocks away. The pastor of said church was also the founder of the school I attended. He himself administered a few spankings to the children at some point in time {not to me though ;-)}.

Now granted I knew better, but a little reminder every now and then didn't hurt.

My opinion today is that these children need there ASSES BEAT!! But not just in school. I personally feel that if a parent doesn't lay a foundation (or at least support your efforts) it is damn near impossible to change a child's ways.

If parents spent more time paying attention to their children and less time allowing other peoples gossip and drama to take up their time, there probably wouldn't be so many bad ass kids!

My generation has it the worse because some of them have been the product of bad parenting experiences themselves. It's hard to raise a child up to do right when you weren't raised that way. Yes it's good in theory, and at times it has happened but honestly, that is a very hard thing to overcome.

I'm not blaming it all on the parents because there are some geniunely, bad seeds out there in the world, but good parenting can make the difference.

So I say NO to corporal punishment in school but YES to corporal punishment at HOME. 

Once again beat your child's ass! not abuse, but discipline! You beat them now, you wont need to bail them out later.




xoxoxoxoxoxo
MsSuga

Cavity Request: Men aint Shit

Men aint shit & why women continue to put up with it? requested by my sister Sapphire


Ladies you are NOT going to like this...BUT...I think men only do what we allow them to.

We get comfortable, as we should, and they take advantage. Granted some of them are just absolutely horrible people that care about no one or nothing else but themselves. But there are a few that have had their hearts shredded and just how we put up a wall block, they do too. Think about that man that you just up and left because his bank account wasn't where YOU wanted it to be. Or the one that had potential but u chose to go to his "well put together brother" yeah he might've brushed you off like it was nothing but yeah...That shit hurts...just like it hurts you.

Then think about the chick he met after you. Bet he didn't let her meet his homeboys, especially not the ones doing better than him. Bet he never showed her he was broke. And probably did everything in his power to make her think he was stable. And trying to impress her and your money hungry, yet broke, ass of an ex...he is now in debt and has moved back in with his parents.

Think about how he felt when you cursed him out and told everyone you knew that he was broke, and what did that accomplish? You hurt his pride, maybe made a few other females turn the other way when he apporached them...but in the end what did you really accomplish? Because you are still sitting around home alone screaming about "Men ain't shit...Men ain't shit..."

Have you ever considered that YOU AIN'T SHIT? & you just attract ain't shit people?

Now don't get me wrong, I've had my share  of losers and heart breakers and I've done my share of heart breaking myself so i do understand both sides of the game. As human beings we can be selfish and deceitful and at times we can be kindhearted and loving. I think that we, myself included, hold on to the past and allow one person to carry the burdens of many. We expect too much from those that aren't capable of filling those expectations then are dissappointed in them for not being what we wanted them to be, but just being themselves. We have to remember that every situation is different. It MIGHT feel the same, It MIGHT even be oddly similar but THIS man is NOT THAT man. And THIS woman is NOT THAT woman.

At some point we have to own up to our contributions to heart break and realize that, we too, are not perfect, and we cannot expect something from others that we cannot produce ourselves. So Ladies yes we put up with alot but so do men. The might not express it as much but consider all the good he does do and how much he busts (


So your sweet treat for today: when making assumptions start with the person in the Mirror and see who really comes next.




xoxoxoxoxo
MsSuga

Brain Fart

Ok so i've been drawing blanks when i try to come up with ideas to blog about. So i consulted a few people and came up with a few very wonderful topics. So...let's see what i can come up with. Ready for a new cavity? Well here they come!!!

xoxoxoxo
MsSuga

Eyes

Your eyes are a mirror into your soul. When people say "look me in the eye and tell me the truth," some truly can see your truth. Technically everyone can, if you know what to look for. One can have the happiest facial expression they can conjur up, but their eyes can show nothing but sadness and pain. One can also "smile through their eyes." Regardless how hard you try, physically there is always a "tell." Some have mastered hiding their inner truths. Some couldn't hide it if their lives depended on it. Either way at the right moment your inner truth can be revealed and you can have never said a word.

When my friend looks at me, there's a smile in his eyes. He tries to hide it by making jokes and turning away when i notice him looking at me, but, I see it. In the words of the ladies from Xcape- "His eyes they show me secrets that he holds deep inside." The true question isn't how he feels but how/if/when will he act on it. But i'm in no rush. Seeing the truth in those eyes is enough to make me happy.


~Ms Suga~

Advice i wish someone would've given me: Questionable "Love"

1} Have you ever been in a relationship with someone, it didn't work out but you two remain friends?

2} Do you find yourself constantly reminiscing about the good times you had as a couple?

3} Have you even considered trying to rekindle that old flame?

4} Better yet, are members of your family on good terms with the members of your ex's family and everyone
winds up at the family functions?

5} Have you noticed that it's hard for you to move on, because every time you meet someone new they either happen to know your ex or have a serious problem with your ex (and their family) still being apart of your life?

6} When the two of you are together do strangers (or people who are not in your small circle of friends) confuse the two of you for lovers?

7} Do you fight with each other and try to hurt their feelings?

8} Do you get jealous when your ex tries to move on with their life?

9} Have you met your ex's next and thought to yourself, "I look waaaaayyyyy better than that"?

10} Are you reading this blog and are thinking to yourself  "Who is this bitch & why is she all in me & my ex's business?"

If you have answered yes to more than 4 of these questions more specifically #1 and # 10 then i suggest you suck it up and accept the fact that your ex is there to stay. They will always be in your life, either as a friend or as a partner. Either way they are in for the long haul and so are you. You might not see it now but that person is in your life for a reason and soon enough the truth will come to the light. Trust me when i tell you... YOU CANT FIGHT FATE! So you might as well fasten your seat belt and enjoy the ride.



xoxoxoxo
~MsSuga~

 "a pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty." - Winston Churchill


Ok. I was reading my sisters latest blog talesofahfg.blogspot.com and this quote stuck out to me. I felt the need to write so...here I go.


I have always been a positive person, always tried to see the silver lining on every gray cloud that came my way or crossed the paths of those close to me. People usually shot down my attempt to be positive, and for the most part I never let them steal my joy. But after a while, the positive shit is for the birds, and you simply just want to be mad or depressed. Even if only for a little while. BUT that mad/sad/depressed/oh woe is me attitude gets you now where in life.


Like Mr. Churchill said "a pessimist finds difficulty in every opportunity" and I concur! Any body can look at any given task and find 1001 things wrong with it and 1001 more reasons why they can't complete said task. But "an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty" and basically taking the bull by the horns and saying that this problem will not get the best of me, i can and will succeed!

Sometime last summer I decided that is what I was going to do. I stopped feeling sorry for myself and started to look at everyday on this earth as a true blessing from GOD. Now, I can honestly say that I am on the road to pure happiness. Granted everything isn't going to be perfect but i have to handle situations in a positive light because I know positive results will follow.

So with that, I encourage the world to hold on to your rose colored shades and look through them as often as possible because if you look at every opportunity as a difficult one then you'll never know when you finally overcome difficult!

MsSuga

Proud to be an American

Ok so idk about ya'll but i am beyond proud of how the world is coming together to help the people of Haiti! After Katrina i know we prayed that there wouldn't be any more horrific acts of nature because honestly New Orleans still hasn't healed from that destruction but to see how fast and how willing people are to help the Haitians is a miracle!

Our local radio station x1023 started a supply yesterday that was just supposed to last a few hours and it's STILL going strong!!

My job has started a supply drive to be shipped out at the end of this week and then another shipment will go out next week.

It's beautiful to see that even in our hard times we can scape together to help others who desparately need it!!

I am truly honored to say that I AM PROUD TO BE AN AMERICAN!



Are You?

Intro

Greetings World!

Thanks for stoppin by to read this Lyrical Sweet Tooth. First of all I am MsSuga i reside @ the bottom of the map in Sunny South Florida! Ever since i can remember i always wanted to be a writer. but i never took any steps to getting there. With that i tell u this...This is my FIRST EVER blog!! I've never done anything like this before so bare with me. If you dont like anything i say then you can kick rocks and get off my spot!

My desire to blog has come from me wanting to spread the positivity that i have building up inside of me. I've come along way in my short life time and mentally i need to help others as well. So these blogs are going to be whatever I FEEL LIKE talking about. There may be several explitives at times but thats just me!

Feel free to comment on any and everything i write, im practicing on how to take, accept and utilize constructive criticisim so dont hold back because i sure as hell wont! If theres anything you want to ask me or you want me to blog about feel free to hit me via email MsSuga1910@gmail.com and I'll try to get that done for you.

You can also find me on twitter.com/MsSuga1910 follow me and i'll follow you back!!

So let's have some fun!!

xoxoxoxo
~MsSuga~